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    March 15

    THIRTEEN PIECES OF ADVICE ON ST PATRICK'S DAY

     
     
    The Creation of Joyce" by Eddie Maloney, with additional blasphemy by The Wizard.

    Happy St. Patrick's Day!

    St. Patrick's Day, as we understand it in this country, is not the St. Patrick's Day of Ireland. Instead, our St. Patrick's Day is a celebration of the Irish in the diaspora. Wherever we are in the world, on St. Patrick's Day, we find each other and, really, find some kind of connection back to Eire.

    Because, at least in this country, the Irish have overcome enormous racism, we are luckier than most, and because we are so lucky, I like to think of St. Patrick's Day not only as a day for the Irish in the Diaspora, but also for the Irish in the North still struggling. Moreover, I think of St. Patrick's Day as a Day not only for the Irish in the North, or those of us in the Diaspora, but as a day in which all oppressed peoples in all diasporas can join the party. I would remind folks that, some countries, "No Blacks, No Irish" and "Irish Need Not Apply" was a reality not too long ago. Hell, we were taunted with being a 'Mick' and terrorist, in eighties UK.
    In honor of this day, which for me, is a combination of Christmas, New Years, and the Fourth of July...thirteen pieces of advice (twelve for the disciples, one for the Son):

    1. Not everybody is Irish on St. Patricks Day, just like not everybody is German during Oktoberfest, and no one expects that you should be. Wearing green is not mandatory...no pinching! Welcome to the party, Celts (Hello Scotland!) and non Celts (Hello World!) alike... Bring your own taste (with exceptions, see next item).

    2. Apropos of this, respect the culture: Green beer, especially Budweiser, Miller, etc. is kind of an insult. Try a tasty Guinness for a change, or, a silky smooth Beamish. If you prefer something lighter, a Harp or Smithwick will do. Do not add green food coloring to such a fine drink as the above. Green food coloring, I suppose, is the only thing to make Budweiser quaffable. And while we're at it, corned beef and cabbage is pretty disgusting. Cabbage doesn't even grow in Ireland. Try a shepard's pie, or even a nice steak. Remember to eat: It's a long day.

    3. If you like a bit of whiskey (the water of life), I recommend Clontarf-peaty, smoky and smooth. Barring that, look for Tullamore Dew or, old faithful, Jameson.

    4. Speaking of the water of life, it is famous for its restorative powers (ask Tim Finnegan). However, use with caution, or you might find yourself restored to a precinct holding cell.

    5. Since this isn't Mardei Gras (it's better), leave the beads at home.

    6. If you play "Whiskey in a Jar", avoid Metallica's cover at all costs. Depending on the time of day, The Dubliners or Thin Lizzy will do most excellently.

    7. "Waxy's Dargle",(particularly the Pogues version), should be played at MAXIMUM VOLUME, first thing in the morning.

    8. Getting a bit weepy over "O Danny Boy", especially if you are Irish, is okay.

    9. Read some Irish poetry before setting out, or Joyce (see below). Gets one in the mood.

    10.Irish Carbombs are to be taken intermittently throughout the day (trust me on this).

    11. Some people have to work today, so be sure to hoist a pint in their honor.
    12. Respect the shamrock. It's more than just clover.

    13. Finally, one for the son: " A jar of wine vinegar was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus' lips. When he had received the drink, Jesus said, 'It is finished'. With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit." (John 19:29-30).
     

    Am off to have some craic and remember to raise the glass, when you can! Slainte!!!